Skip to main content
Smart Question:

My boyfriend and I are looking for resources as we get ready for marriage. We can’t find a minister or counselor in our area that specializes in stepfamilies. Can you recommend something for us?



Preparing to Blend
Editor's Note: Since the publication of this article Ron Deal has authored a pre-blended family guide for both couples and premarital counselors. Learn more here or get Preparing to Blend: The Couple's Guide to Becoming a Smart Stepfamily today. Couple's get a premarital program designed just for them and leaders get a packaged program they can follow.
Smart Answer:

If you can, sit down face-to-face with someone who understands stepfamily dynamics and is trained in remarriage counseling. That is always the best option. However, if you don't have that option consider these recommended "do-it-yourself" resources:

  1. Watch The Smart Stepfamily DVD and work through the study guide together. Even better, find a few couples (small group) to work through the series with. You'll learn a lot from each other.
  2. The book The Smart Stepfamily has discussion questions after each chapter for pre-remarital couples. Read and discuss them together.
  3. Be sure to read our online articles for dating couples.
  4. Take the Couple Checkup — this online inventory is terrific and will give you an x-ray of your relationship strengths and growth areas. It can give you confidence in the future or help you see that you need more strengths before moving on.
  5. Phone Coaching: I now offer phone coaching for couples who want to enhance their relationship. This is ideal for pre-stepfamily couples. Essentially, I can do your premarital counseling with you by phone or Skype.